Sittin' Here in Margaritaville

Scene: (now at a new firm), RS is asked what she is working on by new colleague MD.

RS: I don't know. I'm "on the beach."

MD: What does that mean?

RS: It means I don't have S*!% to do.

MD: Guess I'm "on the beach" too. It'd be better if we were sippin' on some margaritas ....

Did somebody say TASTY BEVERAGE???

E-Mail Follies

E-mail from AE to TC.

"Never tempt a preggars"

Damn Good

Scene: TP hunched over her lunch in her cube.

JS: Check out TP's quesadilla.
TP: There's nothing left, I'm housing it...

You wankers

(Scene: Sydney office. ZH, PM and EH are discussing a certain client’s penchant for speaking in management-consultant techno-babble.)

ZH: We just want to make sure they’re speaking plain English. I mean, we don’t want to be drowning in wank.

Silence around the table for a beat.

ZH: Oh my God, that is totally gross!

EH: Yeah, but it would be a killer band name: Drowning in Wank!

Bet You Didn't Know...

Anonymous: "Everyone is down with Ramadan."

No More Alcohol...

MW to TC (w/ KJ present): So ask KJ why she's not drinking? (alluding to a binge filled weekend)
TC to KJ: Why aren't you drinking?
KJ: Cuz its Ramadan...

Forget Milk - Got Xanax?

(Scene: SC, MW, and JS are lunching at a restuarant with an outdoor patio)

JS: Do you know what I wanna do?

(SC and MW are afraid to ask)

JS: I want to get a whole bunch of Xanax and crush it all up and put it in people's drinks so that they can calm the f* down.

MW: You may be on to something...It's not ER, it's PR!

Before One Can Say "I Do"

AK to MW, SJJ, CM: So, I went to get my blood drawn at this sketchy place for my wedding license and when the nurse called my name to give me the results, she screams, "CONGRATULATIONS." I mean, I don't get why she said that.

MW, SJJ and CM just stare at AK in silence.

CM to group: You should be congratulated. Sphyllis is bad.

That's A Lot of Meat

Scene: Lunch line admiring sandwiches.

EA: Their so big! How am I gonna get my mouth around it?

How come everything today has involved things either coming in or going out of my ass?

Scene: A follow-up training session on negotiation skills, the main topic of conversation is avoiding the word “but” (instead of saying things like, “I agree we need to change the budget, but...” we should say “I agree we need to change the budget; how can we find a good solution?”). The team has been brainstorming ways to keep the “but” out of conversation. ZH leads the charge.

BW, to facilitator: I think you’ve done a great job of lighting the torch of inspiration here, and I also think ZH has agreed to carry the “but flame” forward.

ZH: Hey, that’s sexual harassment!

(Room laughs)

Facilitator: Wait, what’s sexual about that?

(Room laughs harder)

When its more than just wine...

Scene: TS is looking through a local supermarket's weekly flyer and in deep contemplation. After a few minutes pass, TS looks up and says...

TS: When wine is more than 15% alcohol, it becomes a spirit...i love it!

Gettin Jiggy Wit It

RS t0 AK: "Hey about that thingamajiggity you and I are supposed to do tonight?"

Cube farm breaks out in laughter.

Lick me...

JL to TC (commenting on TC's summer fashion attire): You look like mint-chocolate chip ice-cream.

It's Fleet Week in DC

RS: I need someone to speak military to me!

MW: JC speaks military. People sleep on his military capabilities. I'm going to pitch his military capabilities deck so that people know.

JC: Yes, I speak military.

MW: Hear that RS, JC's your guy!

RS: JC are you availble later for me to take advantage?

JC: Yes, just give me a 30 minutes heads up.

MW: JC, you are so easy!

Power Suit, Power Tie, Power Steering...

RS: How was golfing yesterday?

JF: It was fine, but have you ever seen JL without a suit on? That man is ripped!

(the next evening RS enters the elevator with JL)

JL: Any fun plans for the night?

RS: Going to the gym?

JL: Do you go to the one here?

RS: No, in VA.

JL: Oh, I workout in the one here every morning.

RS: I know, JF told me.

(JL looks uncomfortable)

IM Status of the Week

New to Overheard is the "IM Status of the Week"

"melts hearts not icecaps. stop global warming."

Loving the "ish"

Over Gchat:

CM: yeah, he said he'd get back to me soonish, like today

MW: lol. did he really use the word "soonish"

CM: no, but i did :(

MW: i think thats my new fav word

CM: ish is a great modifier

MW: stop with the frown, i like it, i'm a big fan of the "ish"

CM: who isn't?

AE: Is anyone around here tech savvy?
RS: IT

That's what she said...no really...

Email I received about 30 minutes ago:

"Is there a way I can retroactively go ahead and put that in? Or do you do it?"

Before, During and After 18 holes...

Quotes of the day:

#1.

JS: MW you are the funniest person that I know. Sorry JF.
JF: I have creeping humor. You'll get it in a while.

#2.

At the table on the golf course waiting for golfers to visit the table...
JS turns to MW: I am totally doing my kegals right now.

#3.

MW to JS: You're a vegatarian? you don't eat meat?
JS: No, well, sometimes...
MW: What are u like a binge meater?

#4.

Golfer 1 takes a tee and inserts it in the ground...

Golfer 1: I think this is too small for the hole
JS whispers in the air: That's what she said...

Golfer 2 aka Ricky Schroeder: I heard that

RFP's Gone Wild

AK to TC: I want you to massage the backend...

Keycard

RM borrowed my keycard almost 40 minutes ago, I think he's doing a number 2.

Subject Lines Matter

Subject: sit anal

I got an email from a colleague today with the above subject line. Why is that PR folk always try to abbreviate terms? Can you guess what he was abbreviating?

BTW, I sit on my anus all the time.

Hmmm....

Backpack Love...

TKC to LM: Why don't I have a company back pack. It was probably made in the Philippines by one of my distant cousins in a sweatshop.
AK: (Shouts) Don't feel bad about sweatshops, if it wasn't for that sweatshop your cousin would die of hunger

PSA - Cliche'

TO ALL: Please stop using this term. It's whack.

wii Want to Play

Scene: Conference Call
JM: The NY office has Wii.
Anon: Does Wii have beer pong.

Leggo My Eggo...Or Bacons

Scene: shouted over the walls of the cube farm.

TS: Hey CM can you logoff my bacons?
CM: sure thing, I'll just use someonelse's

Guess the odor!

Scene: Over gchat (thankfully).

I: "do you think people can smell my farts through the cubicles?"
JF: "I can smell that from here...filthy"
I: "*&@$#! Serious?!?"

PSA

I CAN NOT, AND WILL NOT, HELP YOU WITH PRINTER PROBLEMS. I DON'T KNOW WHAT CALIBRATING MEANS, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO REPLACE THE MAGENTA CARTRIDGE, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO FIX YOUR PAPER JAM, I DON'T KNOW IF THERE IS ANY LEGAL PAPER. GET INTO IT.
xoxo

The Memories

MW to "The Mayor: I miss KS..."
Mayor: "Yeah I do to, I thought about her last night...but not in that way."

Where's Waldo

Scene: Intern #2 and MW are trying to help AK with a technical problem. After a few seconds, JF walks up to join the group. AK continues to stare at her computer as if she wants to throw it out the window.

JF: Does anyone know where RS is?

MW: I think she went to... AK: &^$#(&

JF begins to laugh hysterically

Zip it...

AK: Hey MW come over. I need your help. I know you know how to do this. Do you know how to unzip?
MW: Well...you have to give it a beer first.

“Zen is not some kind of excitement, but concentration on our usual everyday routine”

AK to RS: "You know how I am about routine, your missing up my routine here."

Don't be jealous...

(Scene: discussing work assignments)

RS to MW: I'm kind of upset. He's cheating on me with you and AE.

MW to RS: It's okay, I'm a whole lotta woman.

Interns '08 aka The New 90210

Scene: MW walking with the Interns to Oce...

MW to Interns: Have you guys been to the Employee Lounge yet?

(some Interns say yes, some say no)

MW: We call this the Peach Pit!

(MW grins at herself as she thinks she made some sort of witty comment but to her dismay they all look at her with a puzzled expression)

MW: Oh, you guys probably weren't born then. I am sooo old!

Spare Some Change?

Scene: RS and LM are waiting in line at the ATM ...

"Bum" to LM: Can you help me buy a sandwich?
LM: Dude, you're wearing F*ing Timberlands and drinking a latte.
(to RS) He should be helping me buy a sandwich.

Taking a chill pill...

(Scene: JF and MW sit 3 seconds away from each other but just discovered the beauty of GChat)

JF: ...looking for work.

MW: I think everyone is. Its like we're all on a corner and there is only one car coming down the street.

JF: Yeah. I guess I'll just chill...

Dress up...

LVG to MW: "Can I borrow your dress? I have a date tonight."

 

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Want My Bod?

PR: I got nothing for you.
AK: For me? Wait! Come here.

(PR continues walking)

AK: PR, come here!
PR: You just want my body.

Cubeland: WOW!!!

Status Updates

Situation: A colleague joins the 21st century (finally) ...

AK: Oh my God, there are SO many pictures of me on Facebook!!!

Lights Out

Scene: TC and JF walk into a room...lights off.

JF to TC: I wish it wasn't dark in here.

They're Magically Delicious!

RS about an Irish schoolteacher she spoke with for a client: "I want to adopt him."
TC: "You know you can get the same thing in a box of Lucky Charms."

Where's The Love?

Scene: Two colleagues reunite for a client project and haven't worked together in almost a year. A line from a recent phone conversation.

TC: You gettin' a lot of TC love today dude, whatcha gonna do with all this love?
RM: I'm gonna store it for a TC love winter.

So Boutique...

Scene: Training exercise on counseling clients to go digital. After Team 1's role playing session Team 2 is asked to critique their performance. Team 2 was critiqued pretty harshly about a half hour earlier by Team 1. So it goes...

Trainer: So PK what did you think?
PK: I felt it wasn't integrated, not part of a worldwide firm. It felt boutique, it was boutique to me.

Fish Tales

Scene: Via IM discussing a client event and the possibility of seeing the mythical whale shark.

DC (3:22:17 PM): do you think we'll get to go to the welcome event at the aquarium?

DC (3:22:25 PM): or should I go to the aquarium on Friday if I want to see that

NYC (3:22:32 PM): haha

NYC (3:22:34 PM): i think we can prob go...

DC (3:23:26 PM):

DC (3:23:29 PM): I mean

DC (3:23:29 PM): they have whale sharks

DC (3:23:47 PM): does that make me a loser?

NYC (3:24:03 PM):

(an awkward silence...)

Boy Meets Boy

TC on client call: "I'll go ahead and introduce you guys. Joe, meet Michael. Michael, meet Joe."
MW: "What is this, Match.com."
LL: "It's okay to look."

Be a leader...

Scene: At Mio Blackberry continously vibrating on the bar.
TC: "Your blowin' up."
PKP: "I'm a leader now."

Winery?

Scene: At Mio

LTS to LL: "Do you know of any wineries in the area?"

LL: "I do know a lot of b!@?#'s upstairs I work with that whine."

Sometimes you feel like a "poke," sometimes you don't...

RS: I have't done my facebook monitoring yet!

MW: Me neither, I have been super busy...

RS: I have to go on to "poke" Puffy

(signing on to Facebook "where everyone can join")

RS: WHAT! He didn't "poke" me back...The bastard!

Potty Mouth

The situation: RS runs into the evil MAH in the bathroom. After dodging mercury poisoning rays, RS relays story to TC, who's only question is: "Did she pee standing up?"

While hard to say, we're pretty sure she did ...

Not So Smooth Drink Convo.

Scene: Few bottles of wine and great conversation, then....

KJ to Everyone: Vaseline is universal.

Toe Jam

DK to PMcM (in the ladies room): "I can just tell, I need to get my hair cut."

PMcM: "I know, your hair is like my toe nails - I need them to be just the right length. No one else knows when they're too long, but I just have to cut them."

Fish or Cut Bait

LL: I don't fish, 'cause I don't like to touch dead things.

Client 9

Scene: Behind the scenes at a client event reading an article about Elliot Spitzer
TC: "You know what's disgusting? The fact he paid $80k"
CD: "Now that's a lot of SEX!"

Poppin' Pringles!!!!

KG to TC: "Hey, these Pringles are great! I'm in trouble."

JF (screams): "Once you pop the fun don't stop ..."